Welcome to ...
For Saints...
Carlton Palmer and Robbie Slater are never shy of airing their opinions. So when the two joined forces at Southampton in 97/98 there was bound to be trouble. One day in training they were playing in the same team during a five-a-side. "*ucking hell, Robbie. if you're not going to try go inside," opined Palmer sensitively. He continued to bait Slater and so the Aussie piled in. The other Saints dived in to break it up, but Palmer kept mouthing off so Slater started Round Two. He was still fuming after training and stormed into the dressing room to find the gangly Brummie. " Carlton, *uck off," said Slater. diplomatically. Fists flew again before tired team mates prised them apart. "You're an *rsehole, Palmer," opined Slater. "Everyone knows you're an *rsehole."
For West Ham...
Don Hutchinson is a fine midfielder with the ability o place a pass on a Budweiser label. He's also got a bit of a temper as an incident during his West Ham days shows. Former Liverpool star Craig Johnston had organised a 'friendly' five-a-side game at the Hammers' training ground and was filming it for a FIFA presentation.. During the game, Hutch made a knee high tackle on his equally combustible West Ham team mate Robbie Slater. When Slater got up he confronted Don, who responded by aiming a Cantona-style kung-fu kick at Slater's back. Slater went ballistic and the two had to be dragged apart. Both players were fined for the incident, but sadly the most interesting part of Johnston's video ended up on the cutting room floor.
For Australia...
In his aptly titled autobiography, The Hard Way, Aussie Robbie Slater describes a cracking bust-up. In the build-up to Australia's 1994 World Cup qualifier against Canada, the squad was playing a practice game at the St. George's stadium in Sydney and Slater's side were winning easily. Veteran Frank Farina (who would become Australia's coach), was on the other side and was getting wound up by Slater's triumphalist antics. At the end of the session, he told him so. "Oh, *uck off Frankie, you nugget," replied the tactful Slater. The red mist descended and Farina piled in. They later shook hands- "We'd behaved like idiots," admitted a repentant Slater.
Unfortunately a hack had seen the whole thing and waited until matchday to plaster the story over the back pages. Oops.
and a Saints fight Slater wasn't actually in...
In 1980, former European footballer of the year Kevin Keegan surprisingly joined Southampton from SV Hamburg. A few minutes into his first game he began to wonder why. Keegan was given the captain's armband and proudly led out his new team against Man City at the Dell. The intense atmosphere sparked a strange reaction among two of Keegan's teammates. After 10 minutes the stressed-out ref approached Keegan and said, "Kevin, if those two do that again I am going to send them both off." Kev looked round to see two team mates, Steve Williams and Ivan Golac, punching each other. Kev stormed over and told them to sort their grudges out in the Gym on Friday, not in front of the TV cameras and a capacity crowd.
Neil Ruddock
On the flight home after Liverpool's 2-1 away win in the 1995/96 Uefa Cup tie against Spartak Vladikavkez, comic genius Steve Harkness urinated in Robbie fowler's shoes while he was asleep. When Fowler angrily demanded to know who'd done it, everyone pointed to innocent, sleeping Neil Ruddock. So Fowler took his revenge by cutting up a £300 pair of Gucci boots from Ruddock's bag. His team-mates' sniggers alerted Ruddock as the plane came in to land. When Robbie refused Razor's request to replace his ruined shoes, he punched Fowler on the nose, to the delight of the tabloid journalists waiting in the airport.
If you've got a tale that should be in Slater's Fight Club e-mail it to christian@onthecross.co.uk